Your Own Two Feet

Many times, I am tempted to reduce myself to my weakest area, to define myself by my failures. In the Bible, we see that there are nameless people who are identified only by their lack, their sin: the man born blind, the woman caught in the act of adultery, the foolish rich young ruler, the prostitute carrying the alabaster jar. All of these nameless people represent our own lives today. It is easy to allow what is broken, what is wounded within us, to define who we are, and so by doing to remain stuck in that brokenness. 

In order to enter the destiny and plan that God has for us, we must by all means assume a new role. A role not defined by our brokenness, our woundedness, our sin, our illness. Obviously, we acknowledge we are broken, wounded, that we were in sin, but we can't stop there. In order, to move past that label, past those established parameters that have defined and limited us, that have served as boundaries and as prisons for who we could become, we have to submit ourselves to the touch of Jesus.

Submit, I use that word carefully, because many times Jesus has to ask us: "do you wanna get well?" Some of us, me included, can be so satisfied in our brokenness. We like the mat where we are lying and we don't want anyone to tell us to get off of it. That mat, that security blanket, that set of crutches, that support our emotional lameness; we don't want to get rid of it. It's comfortable, it's, as my mother would call it, our pet demon, or as in the words of Golem "our precious." And we don't want anyone touching our Precious. 
Standing upon your own 2 feet, whether than having someone carry you, assuming responsibility for your own physical health, whether than accepting hand-outs is all rather frightening when you get down to it. So is it any wonder than many people determine that it's safer, and just a whole lot more comfortable, to remain broken?
But if we're more to be than the nameless individuals that pass through the pages of the Bible, we have to press forward into Jesus. We have to touch the hem of his garment, so that His healing can flow from us to him. So that we can put down our soiled garments, lay aside our soiled mat, leave the crutches behind us and walk into new life. 
Standing Upright,
MJ

Little engine

There once was a little engine, who could, at least she thought she could. Many times she moved much like a locomotive, so quick, so speedily down the track. Then one day, she came upon a derailment. A piece of the track had been dislodged, and in her hurry, she didn't recognise it. And as her wheels speed down the track, she suddenly found herself in mid-air, wondering how she could ever land safely upon the track again.



During that burst of sudden airborne flight, Grace was given to her. Divine calm, and a peace, that she would have never known had it not been for the derailment. Life has its unexpected realities. Sort of like that little train's unsuspected flight lesson. But if we are quiet and still long enough to sense God's presence, those still moments can lead to a greater treasure than the one we thought we were heading toward speeding so recklessly, carelessly and casually on our way to who knows what or where.

We then exchange our 'could' for His 'can.' And we soon learn that what we can do through Christ is much greater that we could do in our own strength. Jesus said it best in John 15:5, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing." 
On Track,
MJ




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The Princess and the Pea

Holy Spirit can be like that irritating little pebble at the heel of your shoe that keeps grounding and digging until to we just get to that point of telling the truth. It is His nature as the Spirit of Truth to lead us into all truth, but many times, we are hesitant to speak the truth in love to ourselves and to others. So, we begin a process of self-deception, of keeping secrets, of covering sins and simply lying and deluding ourselves. If we continue in this process, we will likely end up with a completely seared conscious that is described in Ephesians 4: "We will be given over to a reprobate mind which will no longer allow us to distinguish between truth and lies."

I have found that, Holy Spirit is an equal opportunity exposer. He will expose my sin; He will expose others. This fact is an important idea for me, because many times when I'm convicted I want to point fingers at the other person, to say he is also to blame. But because I know that Holy Spirit is a Person of justice, a Person of equity, I can trust that the same Holy Spirit, that is convicting my heart in the ways that it needs to be convicted, is also convicting his. Now, obviously it's my choice and that individual’s choice whether we choose to get to the heart of the place of repentance.

Some people are incredibly resilient to the truth. They can walk around with a boulder-sized rock in their shoe, and it doesn't seem to bother them. However, I've recently learned it, that doesn't mean that the Holy Spirit isn't digging, isn't poking, and isn’t pressing them to repent. It's just that the heel where that rocks sits has become so callous and hard, that it's resistant to the truth. Now, that doesn't give me an excuse to become hard and callous to the truth or to point a finger and say "I'm waiting for that person to repent; when he repents, I repent." No, I repent as soon as I feel that gentle digging irritating pebble that I know is keeping me from being levelled in my walk with God. That is keeping me separate from His best for me. That's keeping my prayers bouncing off the ceiling and coming right down because I'm walking in disobedience and unforgiveness.

So, in the end, Holy Spirit is an equalizer whether he comes as a small pebble, a gigantic rock, or even a large mountain that people don't see, He still comes whether people receive Him or not. I'd like for him to come with just the strength and size of a small pea so that being the princess that I am, I recognise his presence.

Smoothing Away Callouses,

MJ

Lessons from Brazil

The shoe is now on the other foot. There is a team here now from Curitiba, Brazil, and its curiously ironic that when it was time for me to do my Discipleship Training School (DTS) Outreach as part of Youth with a Mission's (YWAM) program it took place in that city. 

 
At that time, in 1998, there was only one base; now there are six. In 2011, I returned to Curitiba to teach at the English Language School serving in the place of my former DTS roommate. Some members of our team were Brazilians who had completed the English Language School at the Richmond, Virginia base.

Our team was multinational composed of Americans, Brazilians,  Swiss, and Dutch, and because of that we had an advantage over this small team that is now in South Africa. I would often share in English and then members of my team would translate for me into Portuguese. But these individuals are now in South Africa, where English  is normally spoken as well as Afrikaans, so the dilemma that they have in reaching the people is more acute. In essence, someone needs to translate first into English and then into Afrikaans. 

This group modeled service by washing feet and loving on the
least of these.  The translators, minister director, and assistants,
many and diverse, served
 alongside of them.

This small group of four girls and four boys really impressed me as they move outside of their comfort zone and are ready to create unity in the body of Christ and bring joy to God's people, especially to the little children in the ministry where I work in Avian Park and River -view. It's got me to thinking about community, about access, about moving pass one's comfort zone, about unity and the purpose of God. And I see myself standing in Curitiba before a large church audience and my Brazilian sister, Karina translating, as I share God's love with another nationality and a far different place.Who would have thought it, that one day I would be the one hosting a team of the nation, the city, the missionary base, that first welcomed me?

God literally wastes nothing. If we've experienced it, we can expect to see it again. 

That English school where I taught in place of my roommate Licia, while she was pregnant, also came back to be a help. I ended up serving as the pronunciation teacher at the English Language School at this YWAM base in Worcester, South Africa.  By the way, she had learned English while a student at the Richmond ESL school as well.


And we know that all things work for the good of those who are called according to God's purposes (Romans 8:28). Some water; some plant, but God gives the increase (1 Corinthians 3:6).

A Haunting Tale

  Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between the towns of Mizpah  and Jeshanah. He named it Ebenezer (the stone of help or thus far God has been in our help)
 (I Samuel 7:12)

Because of undealt with issues, unmet needs and unhealed hurts it may feel sometimes as if one is carrying around a ghost. Like the story of Ebenezer Scrooge, we too have three ghosts of Christmas Past, Christmas Present, and Christmas Future. The ghosts of our regrets about past decisions, tensions about present circumstances, and fears about unrevealed futures can lead to restless nights and sleepless ones as well. In the midst of all this uncertainty and unrest, God comes and speaks, "Peace, be still." But ultimately like Ebenezer, we must need face the past, we must need face our unmet expectations, unfulfilled longings.

In an earlier part of the story, Ebenezer so longed to marry a beautiful young woman, but his brokenness and wounded-ness inhibited that relationship and ultimately destroyed it. It is for reason also that his relationship with his associate, Bob, also goes badly. It must have seemed to Ebenezer that wherever he turned there was loss and a sense of incompleteness. So he hid behind any wall that he could find. In his case, he hid behind money and success. Isaiah 30:12 talks about building walls that eventually collapse upon one and leaves one with nothing but ruins; only scraps of building material providing little enough to hold a cold drink of water.

Ebenezer was a keen example of that. It's rather ironic that his name means "Rock of God" or "Strength of The Lord." But he trusted in his own wisdom, in his own abilities; he did not lean and rely and trust in God. For that reason, everything he feared, just as Job said, had come upon him (Job 3:25). He lived a miserable life surrounded by emotional and spiritual squalor, isolated and separated by people, eaten up and destroyed by the very things that he coveted. His life of greed created a cell wall around him. He became imprisoned by the very things he cherished more than people and was almost destroyed by them, except for the three ghosts.

I wonder if God allows us to be haunted for a season at least or may be just for a night by our own ghosts of regrets so that we too, like Ebenezer, can take that haunting to heart, repent and find life once again. When we make idols of our money, accomplishments, or even families, be sure that God loves us enough to allow us to experience some sleepless nights so that we can turn our eyes and hearts back to the One who alone is the Mountain of Our Salvation. As we reflect on 2014, may we also realize that all our help has come from the Lord, Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm 121:1),


Sleepless,
MJ

The Royal Dry cleaner

That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish (Ephesians 5:27).

Holy Spirit is the Royal Dry Cleaner. So, it's his job to remove every spot, blemish, and wrinkle in order to prepare us for the second coming of Christ. See Jesus is coming for a bride who is spotless. 

And as the royal and official dry cleaner,  it's Holy Spirit's duty to make us ready as a fit vessel to wear the royal diadem and the pure white linen for the righteous acts of the saints.

But, how does he do this? David said: that God desired truth inward parts. That's where the Holy Spirit comes on the scene. He is the spirit of truth, and it's his job to reveal wherever there is deception, wherever there is falsity, wherever there is any spot, blemish or wrinkle that does not reflect the nature of Christ. We are encouraged to take captive every thought that exalts itself above our knowledge of Christ. So He shines his divine spotlight on the broken places, on the blemishes, that He might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

His truth puts out of doors, the fear, the anxiety, the lies of the enemy, and in their place, we have the cleansing power of Christ's blood and the truth of his word on that spot, that blemish. That wrinkle is ironed out and is removed and bit by bit, He prepares the righteous linen. He prepares us to be the Bride of Christ to become the inhabiting place of God's presence to come to rule and reign with him.

I haven't always understood the purpose and the ministry of Holy Spirit. But for the first time in my life, I have a personal intimate understanding of his working of his presence, of his purpose here on earth. which is to prepare the bride to make her ready. Every step toward healing, every dealt-with issue, every healed hurt, every wound sutured shut, is a blemish, a spot and a wrinkle that has been removed- another step in the preparation of making me ready and making you ready 

to receive our husband Jesus Christ. It really is a simple assignment: The one that takes a great deal of patience, kindness, and faithfulness. Holy Spirit is ultimately a gentleman who handles our dirty laundry with care and concern.

Gone to the Cleaners,
MJ

The Woman doth protest too much!

If asked whom I resembled in the Bible, likely the least person I would mention would be Saul. But recently as the Holy Spirit has been dealing with me, I recognize that there is some of Saul in me. 1st Samuel 15 tells the story of God asking Saul to destroy the Amalekites. In 1^st Samuel 15:3 to go to attacks and destroy everything to that belongs to them,  do not spare them, put to death men, women, and children and cattle sheep, camels, and donkeys. However, Saul did not follow instructions; instead he captured, rather than destroyed God’s enemies. Instead of killing the terrorist king Agog, he spared his life and saved the best of the livestock to sacrifice to God.

 He believed that his ideas were somehow better than God’s. But God rebukes hi in verses 22, “Do I delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices in as much as obeying my voice. To obey is better than sacrifice and to heed is better than the fat of rams.” I have been guilty of this kind of misguidance, to say the least. Unfortunately, I have cared more about what people have thought, put a greater impact of being a people-pleaser. Now, I have followed instructions, I have been obedient; I have done what I was told, but in my heart of hearts, I am like Saul. These people that you gave me- they wanted- that was always Saul’s excuse for not following instructions. The people, the people, the people.  And, that’s me. What do people say? What do the people think? And God is saying, I am more concerned about what I think, what I say, what I required of you.  Hmm. If I am listening to God’s voice, He has made it clear that what He has asked for is obedience. He didn’t ask for my opinion. He asked me to live beyond whatever is rooted wound in me that makes people’s opinions for more inflated and valuable than his command to simply follow instructions. See, man looks on the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart, and that becomes particularly frightening because my  motivations are revealed for the crass, base things that they sometimes are- they need for man’s approval.