Holes

"You earn wages, only to put them in bags with holes in it" (Haggai 1:6).If one were to compare one's life to a purse or a bag, it might be an apt metaphor. Sometimes it feels as if there are holes in the bag and our very life seems to seep through the seams. Our life, like a  poorly-constructed bag seems to be shoddily put together and doesn't seem capable of holding all the pain, suffering, affliction, and difficulty that it seems forced to carry. So heavy are the weights, like rocks, that it appears the very fabric of our lives will fray and fall apart. That the handles of the bag will be ripped from its seam.Of course, one bag looks dissimilar in appearance from another. In fact, one person may carry what appears only to be a small wallet or daintily-made evening pouch; while others seem to be loaded down with a carpet bag or even something akin to a Samsonite valise. But all in all, we all have baggage. But what really matters is not the size of the suitcase but would we put in it. 

How does one go about making a life that resembles something of value, of tenacity, of persistence, of resilience, of strength? That is the question. So we ask that God do what He promised. He said in Ecclesiastes 3:7 that there is a time to tear but that there is also a time to mend. We ask that He will come in and mend, sew, and repair the broken places. We ask Him to fill our purses with love, joy, peace, kindness, gentleness, patience, faithfulness, joy, and self-control by His Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). There are holes caused by all the wounding, brokenness, pain, and grief of life which cause our power to leak out. "Come now, let's settle this," says the LORD. "Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow. Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool." (Isaiah 1:18). We know the truth that the things that are broken need to be healed: "He is the healer of the brokenhearted. He is the one who bandages their wounds" Psalm 147:3. The holes need to be repaired. Let God sew them together to hold the treasures of His joy and power. Then, we will have something worthwhile to share with others.

Fellow Carpetbagger,
Mella

 

Now, You Realize

 

But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come (John 16:13).

 

The Holy Spirit is the Epiphany Giver. Jesus said that the Holy Spirit would lead us into all truth, but exactly how does He do that. In my case, the Holy Spirit will allow me to experience something and then quietly reveal information and understanding that I have lacked.  Often I have walked a road, then suddenly an epiphany occurs. For example, I have come to understand the most of the negative images I have projected onto other people as holding are really my own true feelings and attitudes that I hold against myself. How did I learn this lesson?  Simply, by allowing Holy Spirit to bring healing and balance in my emotions. David said that God desired truth in the inmost parts of our being (Psalm 51:6), and Jesus said that the Holy Spirit leads us into such truth.

Here’s an ordinary, but meaningful example for me. I had been self-medicating for three weeks trying to get rid of a cough and bronchitis, at least what I thought was bronchitis. Holy Spirit had gently, through a friend of mine, told me that I might have a secondary infection and should go to the doctor. I, being of a homeopathic mindset, decided to continue medicating myself, thinking I was getting better. I was coughing less and sleeping through the night.

What I didn’t recognize was that I indeed had a secondary infection. After I went to the doctor, and received corticosteroids, pain medication, cough syrup, and antibiotics, three days in , I was still suffering. Holy Spirit gently queried to me, as he often does, you realize you have walking pneumonia? That is the way He does things. It is not I told you so or why don’t you listen; why don’t you pay attention; it’s you realize, don’t you?

Now, you realize.  In His quiet matter of fact way, not overbearing or condescending, after I have made some healthy progress, Holy Spirit comes alongside of me and says, now, you realize ? He is the  Epiphany-Giver; without Him, none of us can realize anything. We will keep going our own stubborn ways, doing our own stubborn things and failing miserably at life. We will project all of our pain onto others, assume that the problem rests in someone else’s bosom, and  it is really the brokenness that is in our own hearts...

That is why I love the Holy Spirit. He gently reveals the truth and the healing that he has been doing all along in me. Sometimes, it is at night, but always when I am quiet and when I least expect it that I hear his gently voice say, Now, you realize. And when I hear those words, I know that another lesson is almost complete and  more truth has entered my heart.

 

Becoming a Better Listener,

 MJ

 

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Healing Like Rain

The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The Lord is good to all; he has compassion for all he has made (Psalm 145 v.8-9)

Healing is like rain. What I mean to say is that healing is the product of  the showers of truth. When we allow light and truth to enter our hearts, healing is the result. I have discovered recently that the torrential thunderstorms of life that I tried to avoid, in reality, brought the best crops of restoration, joy, and peace in my life.

Healing comes in the unsettled ways live reaches us: death, relocation, new job, and separation from my family and home. I know because all these things hit my life.  I uprooted myself from everything I had a new call to move to South Africa. I had a call I was to begin a journey, a supposed adventure but it was at the cost of the familiar.

What began as an adventure turned out to be one of the hardest things I’ve ever experienced? I left my classroom of 10 years, my home of 10 years, and my family. Nothing stays the same. Neither people nor places. So, when I returned I was hit with a full storm of emotions: who was I? Where did I belong? How would I or could fit into two worlds? The deluge of coming home to what was not really my home anymore and saying associates and students who no longer associates was more than unnerving. Add to that my church closed the same month I came home.  The deluge seemed ready to sink my craft. Bolts of lightning and frightening rumbles of terrible thunder rocked my world as relationships came unglued and the support I thought would be forthcoming did not appear. Luckily, my small boat was tied to a larger one whose Guide is God.

In the midst of this storm, there was a pilot on the boat next to. He pulled my small ship closer to his larger one and I grabbed the ladder that he had thrown overboard and quietly gathered the strength to enter into his boat. There his gentle ministrations brought healing to my chafed spirit and soul: un-dealt with issues, unmet desires, unhealed hurts. All these rivulets of scars He healed with His tender attentions.

Hebrews 12 states no discipline seems pleasant at the time but it achieves a harvest of righteousness for those who are trained by. That difficult season in my life has produced a firm foundation. I trust completely in God to captain by ship. I do not rely on men to do what only God can, and I resolutely know that no matter many storms hit my life,  He will bring my safely to harbor. Psalm 145: 17: God is just in all his ways; and is kind in all he does. If I did not believe that, I would have given up a long time ago.  Meditate on these promises from Psalm 145: “The Lord upholds all those who fall down and lifts all who were bowed down (v.14). “The Lord is near to all who call on him to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them" (v.18-19).

I pray that no matter what storms hit your life; you will not get out of the boat with Jesus -even if he is sleeping in the stern. One cry from your voice will awaken and will speak Peace to you and the storm, If He doesn’t quiet the storm outside of you, He will quiet the one within, just as he did for me.

Standing under the umbrella of Grace.

MJ

 

Bottled Up Tears

Bottled Up Tears

What if all our tears were keep in a bottle? What if every bad day and every pain were recorded? What then would the atheist and deist say if they knew God cared about even a single tear? In fact, He does. God goes so far as to record each time we cry, and then to capture those tears in a special bottle. We often talk about Jesus’s wiping away every tear once we arrive in heaven: Revelations 21:4 declares, “He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away,” but I believe He desires to blot our tear-stained faces even now. Psalm 56:8 declares that God has “kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?” Every sleepless night, every weep-filled hour, He has noted.

Yes, as Revelation 7:17 promises, “The Lamb in the midst of the throne will be their shepherd, and he will guide them to springs of living water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.”  But, God is present now. God goes so far as to offer a guarantee, a promise for those whose lives seem filled with innumerable sufferings and loss: "Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy!  (Psalm 126:5). He promises to exchange joy for sadness and 'beauty for ashes
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the Lord
for the display of his splendor (Isaiah 61:3)
'

 'I will open rivers on the bare heights, and fountains in the midst of the valleys; I will make the wilderness a pool of water, and the dry land springs of water" (Isaiah 41:18).

How many would say like the psalmist, ‘You have fed them with the bread of tears and given them tears to drink in full measure” (Psalm 80:5) and “My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?”  (Psalm 42:3). Some might ask, “why so much pain?" I would counter that pain is the price of freedom and free will. Men have the right to make choices, unfortunately, much of what is chosen is pure evil, but that does not make God bad. God has promised never to leave us or forsake us alone in the midst of this evil, and that’s the best promise yet.

But what if there were a purpose in all that pain, an opportunity to provide redemption? Psalm 83:4: "As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs; the autumn rains also cover it with pools.” The earth has been figuratively referred to as a ‘vale of tears’ because of the pain we all experience, but what happens if we turn that pain into something plentiful. The psalm is written about those who are on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem. Their joy and expectancy of reaching this beautiful elevation and place of worship allow the dark, dry, dreary valley into which they must pass to seem inconsequential. So it is with those who believe in a caring and loving God. As they pass through the dreary confines of the world, they do not leave it unchanged, their natural expectancy and hope change the dismal situations into which they walked into a beautiful watered garden. Those without hope cannot suggest such things. Why should one work for change if the world and everyone in it is doomed?

Although God records our tears, He chooses to throw our sins into the sea of forgetfulness.
He forgets our sins, but not our pains. We can trust a God such as this- a God who uses our tears to create beauty in the midst of any desert if we only allow Him to do so.

Tear-Sower,
MJ

Big Boys Do Cry

Big Boys Do Cry

Males are often taught to hide their emotions, and in some cultures, those who can’t keep a stiff-upper lip are considered weak, but God invites you to bring all your pain to Him for healing. He invites you to be open, vulnerable, and truthful about your wounds. He invites you to enter that closed-off part of yourself, the locked-away memories that you have so successfully suppressed. You no longer need to disassociate from the pain. What I love so much about Theophostic Prayer Ministry is that it invites God to lead us to truth by His light shining on those dark bleak places. -those valleys in the shadow of death where we would rather not go.The memory is the memory; it can’t hurt you. Let Him take away the sting of the lie that you have believed for so long.  The Truth really can set you free when you know Him/it (John 8:32).

We certainly rejoice in the physical healing that Y'shua's death purchased for us, but those same stripes purchased our emotional health as well, if we would but access it:

"But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed" (Isaiah 53:5).

When we are heartbroken, does our spirit not cry out to someone to listen, to “Record our lament; list our tears on your scroll" (NIV). Some individuals go through a period in their lives in which they attempt to "find themselves" or discover their ultimate purpose for being on earth. Isn’t it nice to know that God takes "account of our wanderings during those restless months and years? He puts our tears in His bottle. Every season is written all in His book?" (NASB).

During the difficult seasons of life, the birth and sometimes death of children, the aging of parents, illness and loss, He is there: "He keeps track of all our sorrows. He collects all our tears in your bottle. Innumerable though they seem, He has recorded each one in His book" (NLT).

In that one big bottle, God has been storing every tear, even those that Jesus wept for Lazarus (John 11:35), and that Mary wept for Jesus. All together.  Somehow He recognizes to whom each tear belongs and the precious and grievous story behind each one. What if all the tears together have to fill the bottle, and once it is filled, Jesus comes back?  When the bottle can take no more pain or grief or joy, will we see Him ?


The tears shed by the child being molested and those too tired to cry for water. The mother receiving corporal punishment from her abusive husband. The child locked away in the basement. The cancer patient undergoing chemotherapy. The father happy to see his daughter married to a man who esteems and loves her. Every tear a story.


God, ever the artist, writes down my poem of sadness, lists my tears on His scroll.
He makes a record of them. (NIRV)

No longer bottled up,

MJ

Skilled Hands

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.
Psalm 147:3

"The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners" Isaiah 61:1

In order for someone to be healed, the process can not be rushed. Today, I was riding along looking  at waterlilies in the lake at the state park, when suddenly I was on the ground.  Life is like that, you know. You're going along and bam, you're on your backside. I fell off my bicycle and sliced my knee opened. The wound required over fifty stitches.

I believe God allowed me to experience both wounding and sewing because He has called me to bind up the hearts of young girls internationally, figuratively to sew up their wounds- spiritually and emotionally. See, I have a vision of opening an all-girls visual and performing arts school near Mt. Carmel, in Israel. But, I needed to understand what it means to be sewn back together. Since, "we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose"( Romans 8:28), I believe God will use this event for his divine preparatory purposes.

With a wound, such as the one I received, a great deal of blood was lost. Because I suffer anemia, there was legitimate concern about fatigue and weakness. Much like a physical wound, an emotional  one can drain your life's energy and cross-contaminate everything around it. That is why a wound must be cleansed and decontaminated. Everything must be sterile, including the physician's hands. At the hospital today, there was a litany of  cleaning rituals including washing utensils, applying disinfectant, and discarding soiled items. Meditate on these scriptures about purity and cleanliness.

I Timothy 2:8 I want men everywhere to lift up holy hands in prayer, without anger or disputing.

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2 Samuel 22:21 "The LORD has dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he has rewarded me.
Job 17:9 Nevertheless, the righteous will hold to their ways, and those with clean hands will grow stronger.
Job 22:30 He will deliver even one who is not innocent, who will be delivered through the cleanness of your hands.

 In other words, purity and cleanness matters to God; it determines if He can fight on our behalf.
Since I have never had stitches, I did not realize what that procedures required. With my injury today, I understand the process better. The wound must first be irrigated with a saline solution. The doctor then used gauze to clean the wound and inhibit bleeding.  In the same way, God uses His Word to irrigate our hearts with His Word: "Cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless" (Ephesians 5:25-27).

Then, the doctor deadened the pain with an injection directly to the site. After deadening the site, he began sewing the interior of the knee together- muscle and sinew.Then, he began to sew the skin back together-even small scraps. The doctor stitched the skin back on to my knee like needlepoint- careful, diligent, and meticulous.  He told me that the small piece would fall off after dying and be replaced with new sin. You see that too is part of the healing process; something has to die to be born again. That is the hard part. God has given us a dream, and sometimes, that dream has to die, to birth something better. Think about it- the nation of Israel wanted a reigning Messiah, that Messiah did not come to them. Instead, Messiah Y'Shua died, but when He returns, He will return as the King of David, the Lion of Judah, not the Lamb who was Slain.


Lastly, the doctor applied the bandages and bound them with tape. God promises in Psalm 147 to bandage our wounds. He binds our wounds so that they will not be infected, but rather healed. He covers our spirits with the seal of the Holy Spirit to keep contaminates out and allow His Spirit to heal us (2 Corinthians 1:22).


God is the ultimate surgeon. He binds up our wounds; He bandages them. He carries us close to his heart, with our wounds, till we are healed. When we are wounded, our hearts are drawn close to God; we heal as He holds to His heart. I know that I am closer to God  in my pain.

I pray that God will use me as His skilled hands to bring healing to the nations- to make a girls brigade of healed warriors. If you want to know more about this project, leave a comment in the box on the blog page or contact me at chutzpahgirl@gmail.com

The Great Physician's Fastidious Seamstress In-Training,
M.J.

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The Healing Power of Wounds

I am sure that you know that wounds have a way of embittering. The pain of rejection can send a message to your soul: you are not good enough.  You have meditated, fast, read, and you are still empty. Where is God in all this pain, especially pain that you have no control over. But, did you know that wounds also have the possibility of healing, too?

There is a sweet girl in my class, Havah. She has a cleft-lip  that has been improved by surgery, but the damage is still noticeable. To me, the child is lovely, but outside of my room, who knows what other voices say to her precious ears. God reminded that when He sees me, He sees lovely, not ___________. But when I leave our secret place (Psalm 91), I need to take the mirror and picture that God has of me, although that is sometimes hard to do. It makes me frightened for little Havah and sad for the child parts of you and me.

After our daily excursion into the world, we often return home smeared with dirt and excrement.  We certainly don't feel pretty or special. We feel soiled. Satan uses those feelings of inadequacies and ugliness to turn is away from Our Father. When we look in the distorted mirrors of the world's carnival or the devil's haunted house, we feel grotesque and strange. We don't resemble the perfect creation that God says He sings over (Zephaniah 3:17). We ask, "Why did you lie to me?"  It's not so much a lie as love for God sees you as an exquisite work of his hands. When I see Havah, I see her petite frame, energy, joy, and I love that crooked smile just as God must have loved Jacob's limp. We may be people who limp into heaven, but Abba's face well be the first face we will see beaming at us at the end of the race. We will hear Him say, "Welcome home, Beloved. You done good." God, of course, is Southern. I don't care how you get there, just get there. You will surely have a testimony.

No matter where you have been wounded, keep running toward the prize: Jesus. Remember, that His mirror and His words are the only ones of the truth. Only your Creator can know your true value: "We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God's throne" (Hebrews 12:2).

Just keeping going,
MJ
P.S. After Jacob's battle and wounding, he got a name-change which signaled a greater nature transformation. He was no longer the schemer and trickster; he became Israel, a holy patriarch whose name means God perseveres or contends. Let God contend for you because one touch from Him in the right place will leave you forever changed even if it leaves a wound.

"Wallflower"

What is a wallflower?  The girl who is never asked to dance; she is so painfully shy that she literally melts into the wall. She holds her head down and because she knows that she will not be chosen to dance, or at least, so she thinks. Walls, what are their purposes? For me, I built walls to protect myself from the pain that others brought and just life itself. Yet, God declares that, "this sin will become for you like a high wall, cracked and bulging, that collapses suddenly, in an instant" (Isa 30:13). God tells the Israelites that they trusted in their walls, other means of salvation and deliverance, in this case, the Egyptians. Yet, those very walls would crash and ultimately, destroy them.

In fact, "It will break in pieces like pottery, shattered so mercilessly that among its pieces not a fragment will be found for taking coals from a hearth or scooping water out of a cistern" (v. 14). God promises nothing useful will be taken from these idolatrous walls. God asks the Israelites and us today to accept his solution, "In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength" (v.15). God asks  us to trust in Him and not in our own defenses, but how can we do this?

After experiencing pain recently, I was offered the choice of retreating behind my walls, but I knew that those walls were idols that I used to control my emotions. They were vain imaginations that I used instead of leaning my entire personality on Christ.  So, what choice did I have?  I heard God say that He desired for me to know truth in my inner parts (Psalm 51:6): "Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place." What exactly does that mean? It really meant to tear down every vain imagination and high lofty wall I had built that contradicted who God said He made to be and who He was to me. II Corinthians 10:5 declares that we must "demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." The truth is  "I am accepted in the Beloved" (Ephesians 1:6); "I am more than a conqueror" (Romans 8:37), not this wallflower myth I have believed for so many years. Thank God for freedom! Let the redeemed of the Lord say so!

Those who have been abused suffer a second-time for not having been believed, so it is tempting to try and prove our innocence. But, God is our vindicator and defender. We cry out to God who delivers us from our enemies. We don’t need walls to retreat behind. We don’t have to deaden our pain through food, exercise, and alcohol. We can come from behind the walls because Adonai Tzvaot, the Lord of Hosts, rouses Himself, to fight on our behalf: "Let God arise and let his enemies be scattered; let those who oppose Him run in defeat from his presence" (Numbers 10:35).There is no fear in love (1 John 4:18). If I fear, I hide behind walls. I become a wallflower. Read the questions and answer them truthfully. What if you could accept what Christ has done for you?

Why does rejection speak louder than Your Acceptance, Y’Shua?

Why does fear speak louder than Your Love, Y’Shua?

Why do curses speak louder than Your Blessings, Y’Shua?

Why do criticisms speak louder than Your Exhortations, Y’Shua?

Why do lies speak louder than Your Promises, Y’Shua?

Why does loneliness speak louder than Your Presence, Y’Shua?

Why does pain speak louder than Your Peace, Y’Shua?

Why does sadness speak louder than Your Joy, Y’Shua?

Why does emptiness speak louder than Your Spirit,  Y’Shua?

Why does doubt speak louder than Your Cross, Y’Shua?

Why does fear speak louder than Your Love, Y'Shua?

Gladly, No longer a Wall-flower,

MJ

A Change of Clothing

In order to marry, one needs a change of clothing, right? Most folks don't get married in jeans and a t-shirt or their work dungarees.  I had not given it much thought, but Ruth had to change from her garments of mourning. Ruth and Naomi had to loose their black shrouds of widowhood that signified loss and death to embrace their new status as a bride and mother of the bride.

God promises us that "Never again will [we] will be called Forsaken, but instead we will be known as "the Bride of God" (Isaiah 62:4).  No more Azubah- "Forsaken" and Shemamah, "Desolate," but Hephzibah, "My delight is in her" and Beulah- "Married."

For Ruth, such an idea must have seemed ridiculous. She was a poor foreign widow, saddled with a bitter mother-in-law. Who could possibly want to be a part of their story? Into their story arrives Boaz. Into our own, arrives our Kinsmen Redeemer, Y'Shua. The Lord claims us as His bride (v.5) He rejoices "over [us] as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride" (v.5). He commands us to "clothe [ourselves] with strength; put on [our] beautiful clothes]. Rise from the dust and sit in a place of honor " (Isaiah 52).  He places a "crown of beauty instead of ashes; blessings instead of mourning, praise instead of despair" (Isaiah 61:3).  He then commissions us to rebuild the ancient ruins and repair the cities to dwell in ( v.4).

You are rightly "overwhelmed with joy in the Lord [ our] God (v.10), "for He has dressed you with the clothing of salvation and dressed you in a robe or righteousness. (Ezekiel 16:10). The Lord declares, "I bathed  . . . and put ointments on you. I clothed you with an embroidered dress and put leather sandals on you. I dressed you in fine linen and covered you with costly garments. I adorned you with jewelry: I put bracelets on your arms and a necklace around your neck,and I put a ring on your nose, earrings on your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. So you were adorned with gold and silver; your clothes were of fine linen and costly fabric and embroidered cloth. Your food was fine flour, honey and olive oil. You became very beautiful and rose to be a queen. And your fame spread among the nations on account of your beauty, because the splendor I had given you made your beauty perfect, declares the Sovereign Lord." (Ezekiel 16:10-14). I hope that we will not squander these gifts like the nation of Israel did.

Naomi wisely instructs Ruth to "Wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes. When he lies down, note the place where he is lying. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do” (Ruth 4:3,5). Like Ruth, we rise up and put off  our mourning clothes. We rise up from the place where depression, disappointment, death of vision, unmet needs, unhealed hurts, and wound spirits have prostrated us.  We may have to crawl to the altar where our Beloved waits and lie down at His feet,  but He lifts us up to a place of beauty. However, friends, we must leave our garments of death behind to walk into the beautiful future He has for us. God can be trusted. He will not allow us to dry on the vine. He will take the pain of our loss and produce great blessings for us and others.

Transformation is radically beautiful- it attracts others. Just as bitterness can be a magnet for more pain, joy and health can attract God's best for us. God wants to clothe us  in His righteousness, and his beautiful fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). His grace and kindness make even the most common of us truly beautiful brides. Look up into the smiling face of your Redeemer and Kumi Ori- Arise Shine.


Welcome to Beulah-Land,
M.J.

"Only the Sun Has Wings"

How did she do it? We know it took incredible courage to leave her homeland and family.  We realize she was quite brave to embark on a new journey to plant roots with a people she didn't even know. But through the long difficult seasons of hard labor, selflessness, and sacrifice, how did Ruth not become embittered? The seasons of service and wondering if the God of the Israelites noticed or even cared- Boaz was of only secondary importance. Even he recognized that Ruth was coming under the wings of Adonai.  He declares, "May the LORD repay you for what you have done. May you be richly rewarded by the LORD, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge” (Ruth 2:12). Boaz will foreshadow the words of the psalmist, David, his own grandson: "How priceless is Your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge under the shadow of Your wings!" (Psalm 36:7). It makes one wonder if David was thinking of this story when he wrote those words.

Although unexpected, Ruth becomes the pursuer and humbles herself even further: “I am your servant Ruth,” she said. “Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a guardian-redeemer^[ of our family.” The Amplified Bible expounds, “Spread your wing [of protection] over your maidservant, for you are a next of kin.”  (Ruth 3:9). Ruth requests that Boaz be the physical representative of Gods' covenant grace to her. The same God who protects Ruth, a vulnerable single woman entering the night to prostrate herself before a man, full of food and drink- will protect all we are brave enough to leave in His hands. It takes God's courage and healing to wake up each many without her husband, God's strength for the bitter tale of woe she has lived with her embittered mother-in-laws, and God's endurance for the tedious and back-breaking work of gleaning in the field.

Still, God restores her dignity, beauty, and physical strength. The Lord promises you, "But for you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall" (Malachi 4:2).God promises us angelic protection as we serve Him (Psalm 91:11), but this protection is even greater because it comes directly from God's throne. God himself  "Covers you with his wings; He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection" (Psalm 91:4). God rides from heaven to protect you (Psalm 18).

Only Y'Shua can rise with healing in His wings. God promised that your wounds will heal quickly. Isaiahh 58:8 assures you that "Then your salvation will come like the dawn, and your wounds will quickly heal. Your godliness will lead you forward, and the glory of the LORD will protect you from behind. Your godliness will lead us forward and the glory of the Lord will protect us from behind. The dark will shine around us as bright as the sun." The Lord will guide you continually- giving you water when you are dry and restore your strength. We wonder what our obedience and service will yield. There is our promise in blood-covered ink. His promises are true; His plans really are to bless and give us a hope and a future (Jeremiah 2911)- even when that is so hard to believe, given our circumstances. But, we walk by faith and not by sight (II Corinthians 5:7).

Ruth's soul said "yes" despite everything- despite every deprivation and disappointment. Despite the uncertainty. God requires more of thee and me. We have been predestined to do the works created for us before the creation of the earth (Ephesians 2:10) . He is calling us to higher things. Let your heart and soul say yes.  I understand how you can look around you and see lack and unfulfilled promises and selfish people. It can be bewildering to trust that God can make something good out of the circumstances in which you find yourself. But, my friend, this place is the first step of faith. Like the one Ruth took when she left her family, gods, and culture. I invite you to meditate on the psalm that follows, for it summarizes eloquently what God has promised to do for you and me if we revere His name and trust Him to come and save us. He will be a Promise-Keeper. He will give you beauty for ashes and a future filled with His Presence and Delight.

1Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me,

for in you my soul takes refuge.

I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings

until the disaster has passed.

2I cry out to God Most High,

to God, who fulfills [his purpose] for me.

3He sends from heaven and saves me,

rebuking those who hotly pursue me;       Selah

God sends his love and his faithfulness.

4I am in the midst of lions;

I lie among ravenous beasts—

men whose teeth are spears and arrows,

whose tongues are sharp swords. (Psalm 57:1-4)

 

Fellow Faith-Walker,

M.J.

P.S. I have a confession. I started this devotional March 19th, but I needed to learn some more lessons before it was truly ready.

"Backdoor Blessing"

What is love? Naomi eventually learned what Ruth always knew. Love protects. It guards the reputation and value of the beloved. It prepares for the beloved's future: "One day Ruth’s mother-in-law Naomi said to her, 'My daughter, I must find a home for you, where you will be well provided for' " (Ruth 3:1-2). It seeks the beloved's highest good. Love is not jealous. Naomi rejoices in Ruth's marriage and subsequent birth of a son.  She stopped demanding her own way. She was kind and tender to her young charge, Obed.  She released her feelings of being wronged by God. She left her irritability behind.

The miserable woman who wanted only to be known as Mara, bitter, allowed the community women to see her and offer her blessings without once rudely throwing them back in their faces: ^"So Boaz took Ruth and she became his wife; the LORD enabled her to conceive, and she gave birth to a son. The women said to Naomi: “Praise be to the LORD, who this day has not left you without a guardian-redeemer. May he become famous throughout Israel! He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age. For your daughter-in-law, who loves you and who is better to you than seven sons, has given him birth” (Ruth 4:13-16).

She could have said, "this child is not really my grandchild." But she realized that God chose to bless through the backdoor.  When what we expected doesn't happen, we are tempted to be angry at God. But, God intends to bless us through a backdoor.  He plans on blessing us through a relationship we have never imagined. He brings into our lives someone markedly different from us so that race, culture, gender, and age become bridges, not boundries. Through a distant relative and a foreign woman, God intended to bless Naomi and Ruth. Naomi rejoiced that truth had won out- that Abba God is faithful. The enemy often comes to accuse and hurl insults, not at us, but  at our Daddy God. He tells us, "His too long in keeping his promises;" "He hasn't heard your cries." It is easy to believe that especially where other people are involved. He needs time to change us and them.  But love never gives up. Naomi saw that in Ruth when she arose every morning to work in Boaz's field.   Ruth somehow did not lose faith. Love always hopes and endures through every circumstance.

I have a friend who is traversing through a difficult time; each time he speaks of the person he loves, it is with respect, never rancor, for her ending the relationship. Love protects, even when the one who has offended doesn't deserve it. It protects reputation, honor, self-esteem, and self-concept. It speaks God's promises over the beloved and calls for God's goodness to shower that person so that he or she can walk into his or her destiny.

I have another friend who was not defended or protected by her mother, father, brothers, or husband; she has wounds that run deep that God is graciously healing. When we fail to protect those we love with our words and actions, we hurt their self-concept, self-esteem, and we leave them with questions about their worth and value. They wonder if they are worth fighting for- worth defending, worth loving.


Remember, Love Always Protects,

M.J.

Naomi, O' Naomi

Heart of Roots

Did Naomi wonder what was wrong with her that every man she held close died? Did she feel cursed? The root of rejection is so powerful : "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many" (Hebrews 12:15). Hebrews cautions about a bitter root of judgment, but what about when we judge ourselves? Paul tells us not to compare ourselves to others because all we have comes from Christ anyway. Yet, when I look in the mirror, how can I keep myself from judging myself based on  a self-perceived scale of perfection.

Naomi rejects herself when she rejects her name of  'pleasant' and asks to be called bitter or Mara. Naomi must have feared that something was intrinsically broken and damaged in her that all that she loved died. She left her home, her community, and country. She embraced a new life with her small family unit, without the benefit of the extended clan that was so essential in Middle Eastern culture. Now, she had nothing. No husband to comfort her in the night watches; no sons to defend her in the city gate. A widow, alone in the world, in the truest sense of the word. I can understand that sentiment a bit.

Did Naomi feel abandoned? I am sure she did. In her mind, she had merely been simply an obedient wife who followed her husband to Moab. Here is the context of the story, "there was a famine in the land. So a man from Bethlehem in Judah, together with his wife and two sons, went to live for a while in the country of Moab." ( Ruth 1:1) . Eventually^{, "}Naomi was left without her two sons and her  husband" (v.2). With no offspring from her sons' unions, her husband's name and those of her sons would not continue. She now had no one to care for her in her old age.

With despondency in her heart, she even urges her daugther-in-laws to return home: “Go back, each of you, to your mother’s home. May the LORD show you kindness, as you have shown kindness to your dead husbands and to me.  May the LORD grant that each of you will find rest in the home of another husband" (v.9). She was empty-handed, nothing left to offer, in her mind. She declares, "It is more bitter for me than for you, because the LORD’s hand has turned against me!”(v.13). Is that possibly why she so vehemently pushed her two daughter-in-laws away? Maybe as a friend thought, she feared something would happen to her daughter-in-laws as well if they remained with her.

Eventually, Naomi finally gives into Ruth's request to return to Bethlehem. Once there, Naomi illustrates such chutzpah few of us have the courage to express. She was angry with El Shaddai and let everyone know it. She didn't put a pretty face on it. No plastic Fruit of the Spirit. She wastes no time and setting the record straight, “Don’t call me Naomi, she told them. “Call me Mara because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. ²¹ I went away full, but the LORD has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The LORD has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.”  The term afflicted can also be understood as testified against. She felt that God was a witness for the prosecution. El Shaddai is the term used in the scripture; Shaddai is a derivative of a term that means breast; God's name here signifies the Almighty one who nourishes, replenishes, and satisfies.  Despite, her misgivings, I have to wonder if God did not bring Naomi home to fill her with Himself?

I guess I can be both Ruth and Naomi. Like Ruth,  I can look to God for help and sustenance. Yet, I can also be Naomi and wonder why God has been brought me into such a hard place- yet,He wants to give me His best. I am in such place at present. I thank God for all those Ruths that walk beside me at present.  We have much more to glean from Naomi. So, until next time.

God asks Naomi, me, and you:
When did I stop being enough?
Obedience without love

quickly becomes disgruntled compliance

Why I am not enough for you?

With joy, we say You will always be enough for us, O'Lord
M.J.

Confession, Anyone?

People say confession is good for the soul. The psalmist agrees, “If I had not confessed the sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened” (Psalm 66:18). God says if we confess our sins, He will forgive them.  So go on, confess it to a confidant and to God.  Forgiveness is a tremendous gift. However, God whispered something also into my ear. He promised to go one step further- not only will He forgive us, He will heal us. James 5:16 declares, "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.” God promises not only to forgive, but to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. I John 1:19, ensures that “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”

Confession opens the door to greater sanctification and transformation; in essence, healing eventually begets sanctification or at least it should. Leviticus 5:5, “And whoever is responsible for any such sin, let him make a statement openly of his wrongdoing.”  Shame, guilt, and condemnation are all useless.  These acts of self-scourging are impotent.  Jesus took the scourging with 39 lashes to his back to purchase our Shalom- wholeness- spirit, soul, and body.  Bask in walking out of the dark corners of shame into the light of right relationship. Most people repent to God and stop there. Some may even ask others to forgive them. Ultimately, we need to get healing, and finally, we need to be transformed.

God is transforming us into Christ’s image through our confession and our petition for His empowerment over sin. Jude 1:24 declares, that Christ “is able to keep you from falling and to ... [and] is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy.” How does Jesus do this? I am glad you asked. He does it through our confession and the application of His blood or by the theological term, propitiation.   

Colossians 1:22 declares, “But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical ... he has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him.”  Jude and Colossians promise that God will present us blameless at the day of Christ – this work is the completed work of sanctification. Ephesians 5:27, “He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault.” How will this happen? The Truth will set us free. As we confess our sins, He removes that stain. We confess another sin; we work in tandem with the Holy Spirit and place another sin under the Blood. God begins to change our natures so that they resemble His. This character transformation is actually a part of our transformation from glory to glory: “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Who do I think I am actually fooling? God already knows my heart. Lying to myself is as productive as sewing fig leaves together.  Do I want to lose weight?  I must confess and ask for forgiveness. I must make restitution to the people I have hurt.  I process the pain and let the healing begin.  I am being transformed into His image.

A Fellow Penitent,

M.J.

"O' Prodigal Heart, O' Fickle Heart"

I would not know the way to the cross

If you had not brought me

dragging and kicking

Laying down one's life for someone

who doesn't seem to care

or notice is not news to You

While I was yet a sinner

You died for me

You ask me to surrender
my life
to take up my cross
and follow You

You know much of unrequited love

So much your concern
tho' so many dwelling
beneath Your benevolent gaze
know nothing of You
or either heap scorn
upon Your  beautiful visage


So, today I taste a little betrayal
a minuscule morsel of humiliation
Only a fractional measure
of the shame You
despised for the joy of the cross
when You saw me
On the other side of humiliation's
 gain

You saw me through the
blood-soaked tears

"Let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion and the author who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him,  he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God's throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people, then you won't become weary and give up." Hebrews 12;2-3.

5 Days with Ruth

Day 1

What I learned from Ruth

There is a small book in the Old Testament after the grand history of the book of Judges. It tells the story of two single women and their difficult travails. That God draws our attention to see seemingly unimportant people is remarkable. Ruth, boy, I can relate to her hard walk from Moab to Bethlehem.  Being a single female, widowed in fact, and childless in a male-dominated culture that valued women only as reproducers, meant that Ruth's value in the eyes of her contemporaries was not great.  All she had was a bitter mother-in-law Naomi. She had left her family, culture, and even her gods. She had attached herself to someone who was embittered and even disconnected from the God of the universe. She was the surrogate life-line of faith and hope for a despondent woman who had in her opinion every right to be bitter. No longer “pleasant,” Naomi wanted to be known as Mara or “bitter.” We are left understanding at times we are called to love ‘bitter people,’ ‘ stuck people,’ and help them walk a path to God when they can’t even have the faith to do so.  Kelly Minter’s devotional on the life of Ruth became my main stay in the weeks before and during my trip to Brazil. She talks about weeping forward; the fact remains, we are all going to weep, but we should try to weep forward into our future, not backwards, into past.

Sometimes, like Naomi, we flee home- we willing leave the place of provision (she left Bethlehem- the house of Bread) for what seems to be better. In a season of trial and famine, it seems we rely on ourselves, rather than God. Minter states, “Escaping to easier terrain is all too tempting when we’re weary in hardship” (Minter 140).  I understand.   Although Galatians 6:9 encourages us not to grow weary in well-doing we for we will reap if we faint not,” frustration, despair, and hopelessness make us want to give up. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but it achieves a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who are trained by it (Hebrews 11:24-26). A choice of venue does not change us.  In essence, we should not be governed by or circumstances but the God of our circumstances. Warren Wiersbs states, “How sad it is when people only hear about God’s blessing, but never experience it, because they are not in the place where God can bless them.”

That’s enough heavy for today.

Signing off,

M.J.